Such a day! I feel like a new direction has been peeking round a corner today, hinting its existence, and teasing its imminence. I know, that sounds hopelessly vague. Some things get clearer with time! 🙂 Anyway – I don’t know anything past that hint, so I’ll talk about rose petals…
The rose bush I thought was dormant for the winter decided to gift me a vase full of blooms for Mothers’ Day. They’ve already started to drop their petals, but aren’t they beautiful? A delicate drift of scented loveliness – a different stage of life, with beauty still to give.
Have you ever felt used up old petals falling drifting?
Maybe there’s still time space expectancy – to spread a sweet scent over a fading world, and bring beauty back into your part of the garden. ❤
I was surprised to see the sun today, since the forecast had been talking about rain over the week ahead, and we’ve had downpours here lately. I love grey days, especially when they’re just on the comfortable side of cool. I often feel a bit more energetic on those days – not sure whether it’s the “grey” or the “cool” that helps… Still, nice to see blue skies today!
I just finished a book about sunshine.
It was written earlier in the pandemic, when people were still trying to comprehend the “new normal”. It’s a compilation of stories about people making sunshine out of life’s storms…that sounds very airy-fairy, but it’s really about those people standing in their grey cloud realities and looking for the light. You can’t just wish tragedies away, or wish the good stuff in. You can stand where you are, and find where the cracks let the light in. Or let someone close to you see them, if you just can’t get there ❤ One thing that runs through the stories is the kindness of others. That’s something that we saw during lockdowns, and have experienced at other times in our lives. Light will always overcome darkness.
Also, clouds come in different sizes, and shades.
Look for the blue sky. Reach for the light!
Tonight I found out that a friend had died, earlier on in the year. We only knew each other online, and there were many others in our group who knew him better. Still, we had various interactions, and he sent me two books that are still in my bookcases. I will get them out to look through again tomorrow. This song came my way tonight, and I thought it fitting for this post.
I don’t think that his life was “troubled”, as such, but a long life lived kindly and openly will have pain and trouble in it. And then – rest…for someone who spread ripples of love, and shone light where the clouds had formed.
I had wanted to go to an Easter set up at a church we go to sometimes – a “contemplative journey through the events of the first Easter” – but somehow it didn’t happen. It was a modern take on the traditional Stations of the Cross, which I’m not overly familiar with, but thought it would be interesting. So, I didn’t get there. It’s been raining a lot lately. And then, up popped this YouTube walk up a rainy Irish hillside!
Just taking a break from a strenuous programme of watching YouTube and episodes of Death In Paradise 😆 Seriously…I’ve had a good day of catching up with transcribing notes, and revisiting the concepts from the lessons they came from. It’s taking time, but is also inspiring. I’ve been thinking about the “faces” we wear, and the importance of finding why we are here, in this life, in this place. I was watching a cover of a song from Barbie (the recent movie) – the original is hauntingly lovely/sad, but I thought I’d share this one. If you haven’t seen the movie, there’s a theme here of authenticity – of being “real”.
We all spend some amount of time finding out what we’re made for. Some work it out while they’re still young. Some never get there. I think most of us get there at some point…but sometimes, when things change – we’re off again, trying to find our place in the world, and our people. It’s the question everyone’s asking, even if they don’t know it.
I’ve never been big on makeup. There was a brief time in my life where I was an Avon lady. I had a lot of samples, and tried all of them out. It never looked quite right, and I’ve always hated the feel of it on my face. I found a more natural range, which felt quite nice, but still looked odd to me. In the end, I couldn’t really be bothered…my face is mine, and it’s good enough for me 🙂 There are a lot of boxes in the world – ones that people are supposed to fit into, and then stay in forever. By the time we’re in school, and often before, we’ve been put in a box somewhere. It’s generally one we haven’t chosen, and it’s hard to get out. I don’t feel like I’ve fitted in any of the boxes I’ve seen. Maybe there’s room to make a box? One with open doors and transparent sides…flowers and colours and perfumes and songs! After all my years, I’m happy with myself. Not perfect, of course. Still a weirdo to other people. But “me”, as much as me can be. I still have a lot to learn and grow into – that’s a lifelong thing, really – but I’m learning what I’m here for. I hope you are too.
And here’s another song, for when people tell you you “can’t”.
It’s not been too hot today. Lovely! 🙂 We’ve had varying amounts of rain, but no flooding here. The place we’ve moved to is near a river, though, and the water comes up from there. While our house has been dry(ish!), the lower bridge into town has been cut off a couple of times, and we’ve been able to see the flooding over the paddock behind the house. It hasn’t affected us, or our ability to get to town, but it’s good to keep an eye on it…
The garden is green, and needs a good weeding. The roses are slowing down considerably, but I did get a nice one from one of the smaller bushes.
❤
It’s been another day trying to deal with government bureaucracy without my head exploding… I have been enjoying writing up some old notes. A few years ago I did an online course, which at that time only had one year’s curriculum. They’ve just added a second year’s curriculum, and I was invited back as an alumni 🙂 One of the things I’d been wanting to do these last years is to catch up on my notes from the previous lessons and seminars. I had copied out quite a lot (more than I’d thought I had), but I stalled in the middle of one set of lessons because I couldn’t find my notes, and I didn’t want to continue with something else before finishing that class. I have searched through my bits of paper many times, both here and in the previous two addresses. I eventually came to the conclusion that the last two lessons of that class were gone, and I would just have to move on.
When I got the invitation to sign up again for the course, I wasn’t sure at first. The cost was discounted (as an alumni, and also because I think we’re guinea pigs for Year 2 😆 ), but it’s still an extra expense to factor in. We prayed about it, and I didn’t have any clarity, until about an hour or so before the cut off time to enrol. I still wasn’t completely sure (probably because of the money), but decided to go for it… and then I started to get excited about it.
The zoom calls start in a couple of weeks, so I took out all my previous notes to sort them out, and get them finished as much as possible. …and, after all the searching, and all the methodical sorting into each set of lessons… there they were. The two missing lessons, not only clear and easy to read (i.e. not in tatters from moving from place to place), but also in an exercise book, folded back to the right page, ready to be copied out. I think Someone’s looking out for me. And I think I might be supposed to do this year’s curriculum.
We went to a Christmas service Saturday night. It was sparkly, jingly, bright…all the Christmassy things. I got to belt out some carols (I do love carols!), and enjoyed the littlies dancing with abandon (both on the stage and in the aisles – do children come equipped with springs and a battery pack?). We got home and I went looking for new Christmas songs. YouTube threw this one into the mix.
I love the twinkly lights and baubles, the memory of snow and freezing churches, the family lunches and cold after dinner walks to settle the abundance of food. But for all the glitz that the ads and movies show as the Christmas experience, there is just as much darkness and pain. The ones who are broken, whether in body or mind (or both), who find it hard to jump into the glittery fantasy. The ones who are trying to pay the rent and the bills and still feed the family. The ones who don’t have family, or have lost someone loved this year.
For all the different stories out there, it’s good to remember that the first Christmas Day wasn’t neat and tidy, wasn’t sweet-smelling and photo-ready. It was about a small baby, born into chaos and scorn, who came just for us. Who sees past our shiny facades, and looks for the lost and weeping. That Christmas story embraces everyone who looks past the sparkles, to search for the real gift of Christmas.
…and we’re reaching the end of the tunnel of house hunting and all the admin that goes with it (renting seems to be a difficult process these days, even when you can find a place. Lots of documents and procedures).
We’ve been finishing off the packing and organising for the move, and I’ve even managed a good chunk of cleaning. Tomorrow there should be enough people and large vehicles to make it all a bit quicker and easier 🙂 )
We’re all feeling quite weary already… but you know those “Thank you, God” prayers you breathe when things that look like they’ll be difficult suddenly work out? I’ve been saying quite a lot of those lately. YouTube has been helping me along with “out of the blue” suggestions.
Well, it’s an early start tomorrow. At least soon there’ll be less of this –
– and more space, light and silence!
I’ll probably still miss the coloured glass.
That’s our back door at the moment.
This one’s the side window in the toilet.
There’ll be more beauties to capture when we settle. We went to have a quick look around the yard in the new place the other day. There’s a lot of mint in the garden, and a largish chilli bush. Also what looks like a spear of asparagus!
a bit of creativity, a bit of eco consciousness, a bit of inspiration.... hopefully not a lot of pompousness and blathering :D
i'm not entirely sure what's going on here... let's travel along and see...
1000 Fields of Roses 